i’m getting married in less than a year
which is actually so insane to think about
my parents have been the two souls on this planet who have gone above and beyond for me
coming from a different country, working day and night, saving every penny, wearing hand-me-downs, living in a multigenerational home, squeezing into one room
but growing up, i never knew any of that
i was so oblivious to their struggles
and it’s only because that’s exactly how they intended it to be
to me, i saw two parents who had all the time in the world for me
my mom was the chaperone on every field trip i went on
my dad would volunteer at my school on fridays
even with his broken english, he would volunteer to read a dr. seuss book to my class
they never missed an open house
if my grades weren’t looking good, they would meet with my teachers to figure out how i could do better
even in high school, my mom would meet with my teachers to advocate for me
she was the reason my calculus teacher curved an exam that ended up benefiting everyone in the class
they dropped me off at every basketball practice
they signed me up for music classes, speech competitions, track and field, sunday school, conferences, and camps
the list goes on
because of them, i grew up knowing my culture, my mother tongue, my religion, my family history, and most importantly, i grew up knowing who i was and what i stood for
and as i got older, i started to understand what they stood for too
they stood for community
they helped build the first punjabi school in my hometown
they helped create the first sikh community center in my hometown
they have taught thousands of people how to dance bhangra and gidda
they saved every penny to send my sister and i to college
and somehow, while pouring so much into us and everyone around them, they never stopped watering themselves
my dad created a fashion website and designed clothes
my mom taught thousands of girls how to dance
my dad earned his phD in cybersecurity at 52
my mom organized an entire weekend camp for kids and families who wanted to learn about sikh history
my dad climbed Mt. kilimanjaro despite his age and medical conditions
they never stopped learning
never stopped serving
never stopped dreaming
and they continue to inspire me and everyone around them
i can only hope that in some way, i inspire them too
maybe turning 26, applying for residency, and wedding planning has made me think about all of this a little more
i’m about to start a new chapter of my life and build a family of my own, but that doesn’t mean the family that built me becomes any less important
nothing is being taken away
i’m simply just gaining another family
because before i become someone’s wife, before any degree or title comes after my name, before anything i accomplish in this life, i will always be their daughter
everything they sacrificed without letting me see it, every opportunity they gave me, every room they showed up in, every piece of themselves they poured into me made me who i am
i am because they are who they are
